The more trips I take around that big yellow ball of gas in the sky, the more I feel I can relate to the people I once thought of as “old.” I am reminded of the old joke, “I've heard the memory is the second thing to go … and for the life of me, I can't remember what the first thing was.” I was reminded about all this last weekend.
Considering we're all friends, you know I will sometimes share things from my life. I figure that's what I know best. This past weekend, I had a craving for a good hamburger. Not just some fast-food hamburger, but one of those big, juicy, messy ones. So, I made my way to the big, juicy, messy hamburger place in order to address my caving. Now, I've always felt that the one thing that really tops off a big, juicy, messy hamburger, is a vanilla malt. It can't be just a vanilla milk shake, it has to have the malt part. So, after I got the big, juicy, messy hamburger, I headed for the vanilla malt place. The vanilla malt place also has roasted peanuts, upon which you can munch while you are waiting for your vanilla malt, or whatever else you ordered. So, I obtained a few roasted peanuts for myself, while I waited for my vanilla malt. As you might imagine, preparing a vanilla malt is not an extremely labor-intensive undertaking. In fact, it can be done rather quickly, especially in the hands of an experienced and professional vanilla malt maker. This young man making my vanilla malt seemed to fall into that professional vanilla malt maker category, because he completed the task of preparing my vanilla malt rather quickly. Much faster than my shelling and chomping the few roasted peanuts I had gathered for myself. Not wanting to let the peanuts go to waste and not wanting to take up valuable dining space, I decided to take my vanilla malt and roasted peanuts to my car. I placed my much-anticipated vanilla malt on the top of my car as I unlocked the door (you can probably see where this is going, and your instincts are correct). I sat in my car and finished off the last of the roasted peanuts, closed the car door and headed for home. As I was leaving, I heard a faint “clunk,” but thought little of it. When I arrived at my final destination, I reached for the cup holder, which remained empty, because I had never placed the vanilla malt in the cup holder. As you may recall, and it was immediately apparent to me at this point in time, I had placed my vanilla malt on the top of my car; where it remained, for a short while.
I have seen commercials for these brain pills that are supposedly made from jellyfish. I suppose they are designed to make you as smart as a jellyfish. I am seriously considering obtaining some of these brain pills for myself. After all, I can't think of any jellyfish that has driven off with a vanilla malt on top of their car.