Well, here we are. Time to flip another year on the calendar. I should say, “Time to get another calendar,” which reminds me of a cute story that has nothing to do with the original topic of this week’s visit.
For a period of a couple of years, I would buy a new calendar for my mom at Christmas. I thought it was a thoughtful gift, since my mom was often needing to keep up with dates, events, etc. I would usually find a calendar with a different nature scene each month, or flowers or birds; you know, the sort of stuff you think your mom would appreciate. One year, I asked my mom what she would like for Christmas (in addition to a calendar, I was thinking). Her response took me aback, to say the least. “Certainly not another calendar,” was her answer. I have to admit, her reasoning did make some sense. She explained that she could easily obtain a calendar from the bank, and it didn’t cost anything. From a purely economic standpoint, that was perfectly logical. Still, it did sting a little bit, since I had been laboring for years under the false idea that I was being thoughtful. Shortly after that, I was in Tallahassee with my father, Christmas shopping at one of the shopping malls there. One stop he and I would always make was to the bookstore. While there, I had a great epiphany. My mom always loathed professional wrestling. I always had a good bit of fun with this, telling her I was going to take her to the “wrasslin’ matches” one day. She would merely roll her eyes at this notion. While at the bookstore, I thought, “I’ll fix her little red wagon, complain about my calendar gift, will you?” I picked up a calendar with a different professional wrestler each month. Yessir, beginning with Andre the Giant and progressing all the way through the “Junkyard Dog” to Hulk Hogan and nine others (actually, more than that, since a couple of the months featured tag-teams). My dad laughed and said, “Your mother is going to shoot you.” In keeping with the family tradition of exchanging a gag gift or two on Christmas Eve, the calendar actually came from “Santa.” We always knew to be cautious when opening a gift from “Santa” at Mama Mae’s on Christmas Eve. Of course, I never admitted to being the source of her “wrasslin’ calendar” and she never complained about any gifts I gave her after that. In fact, she actually used the calendar for a couple of months, until the sight of a sweaty Jimmy “the Super Fly” Snuka got to be a little too much for her to see every day for a month.
Yes, the original topic this week was going to be New Year’s resolutions. I guess everyone hits on that topic. I think I will keep this year’s resolutions realistic and doable. My resolutions are to gain weight and spend my money foolishly. I think I should be able to accomplish that. No matter what your resolutions are and no matter what kind of new calendar you have, I hope and pray 2024 is a great year for everyone, here on the Sunny Side.