Working with kids that are fairly close to my age is like having a bunch of little sisters that I am coaching. This is pretty amazing for the most part since I get to live out what I wished for all of my life as an only child: the chance to have siblings. However, there are times where the line between coach, friend and sister is blurred. The girls and I joke and play and make TikToks together when we are off the field, but on it, they know that they are the players and I am their coach. They learned this weekend that I will not let them get away with acting as if the situation is any different, and I was worried about the outcome.
One of my pitchers is a tried-and-true mini-me. We have the same competitiveness and mannerisms on the mound. With that competitiveness comes frustration when the defense is not performing how they should. There were some mishaps over the weekend, and my mini-me got frustrated. I called time and went to talk to her and the rest of the defense just to give them a break and prevent it from getting worse. In the midst of her frustration, my pitcher said some things that made it seem like I was more friend than coach, and I quickly assured her that was not the case. I was just as quick with my statement as she was with hers, and I was unsure of how she would respond as I have not had to have those types of conversations with anyone on the team just yet. That being said, she understood right away that she had spoken in an unprofessional way towards someone who was her higher-up, even though I am still a college player myself. We spoke after that inning and talked it out, and I was extremely proud of how she reacted and handled my “tough love” towards her.
I care deeply about my team, but I will not let them get away with acting however they want. I am sure there are people in your life who care just as much about you but still will put their foot down in certain situations. That tough love does not mean that they are attacking you or are out to get you, it just means they want you to succeed in life and be respectful while doing so. Granted, tough love is not the route to take in every circumstance, but it is needed from time to time. The next time you are in a tough love situation, do not get defensive, rather, try to see it from their point of view and understand that it can help you be better in the long run, no matter what the situation is.